☂ happy 31st

you’re 31 in age but surely you’ll remain a child at heart–carefree, energetic, optimistic, loves to find the fun in everything, and can lift everyone’s spirits just by being there.

you still fit into my category of people i can’t stand but you also give me countless reasons to respect you from the bottom of my heart. whenever i don’t spend my time wanting to smack you, i hug my knees in pain thinking of how wonderful you are.

you’re undoubtedly one of the most confident people i know and i can’t express enough how fascinating it is to watch you embrace the person that you are with all authenticity–and you don’t even have to try. you can even make the stupid things you do, not seem stupid at all. they become simply…tegoshi. ex: how you would lay on top of a sleeping koyama after having just played soccer, all sweaty and icky. first of all, who would even do such a thing? oh, you. do we judge you? yes. but do you care? no. why? because there exists no ill intention behind your actions and you do them because you are tegoshi, and that's okay. so we just nod and think to ourselves, “hm, typical”, because you are you, and you do you–and that’s beautiful. 

happy birthday. keep doing what you do. keep doing you.

Akira Baka!

i was, and somehow still am.

recently, i started getting into news, again. not the type that would totally get me back in the fandom, but just partial catching up on their previous releases and activities. i stopped being the active fan and technically left the fandom a long time ago, but i would occasionally find myself coming back to them. it doesnt make me want to be active in the fandom again, and neither does it make me regret having ever left in the first place, which im glad for. i used to think phases like these would hurt like hell, but to my surprise, im pretty cool about it. all i get from these occasions is just pure, plain happiness. i look at them and recall the times i insanely adored them, and i find myself grinning to the fullest. i realize how much happiness they’ve given me, and all the obstacles i managed to overcome all because they were there for me. and as much as i do feel bad that i was not able to be there for them in their journey, im just REALLY REALLY grateful towards them. even when i left the fandom, i never really completely forgot about them. they always had and will always have a special place in my heart. even when i was stanning other groups, a part of me was still a news fan.

i obviously know very little about them but what im certain of is that these boys are strong. they are special. they are unique. you rarely encounter a group with a history of such grieve obstacles and the fact that they, up to this day, are still standing strong and running the race is just amazing. what great insiprations, seriously.

and tegoshi. yes this boy. ive been analyzing what had caused me to get sick of this boy, and i think i finally got it figured out. i was in love with his voice (and other physical traits haha), but not with his character. he has always been a great man, but due to my immaturity, i failed to appreciate it. i was in love with his voice, i was in love with him, but more with his young self. i loved him because he sang really well, and he would always do exceptionally well singing live. i loved him with any hairstyle, but i loved him more with black, straight hair. i loved him for the parts of him that i liked, but i unfortunately didnt make it a point to appreciate who he is as a person.

what i failed to do was broaden my appreciation for him when he himself was growing as a person and an entertainer. i couldnt afford to change the way i loved him when i realized he’s no longer quite the boy i liked. which explains why it was so hard for me to accept him when he couldnt sing like he used to, and when he wouldnt have normal hairstyles.

but oh what a fool i was. tegoshi is spectacular beyond words. he is unbelievably strong with a healthy amount of humility. and i find so much irony in how he is a selfish person, and yet he does everything in order to put a smile on other people’s faces. but then again it is solely due to the fact that he doesnt like showing his weak side, thus it would damage him greatly if he ends up going against himself. still, it amazes me. the fact that he conducts himself in a way that wouldnt leave a negative impact on others shows how much he values other people. he hates showing his weak side, not because of pride but rather because he knows how it will affect others. he knows himself so much. he knows what he wants, what he wants to do, and he does it. i really like that he was given the chance to be on itte q. the show allowed him to explore and discover himself in special ways, and it was undoubtedly an important factor in his growth as an entertainer. it taught him to be selfless and be someone who is always ready to give his whole self for the sake of others, while being professional–even if it means making a fool of himself. and today, that is what you see in him. you see an idol ready to entertain, ready to make people happy. i honestly couldn’t imagine tegoshi being someone other than an idol….and a soccer baka. haha.

okay this ended up being really long lol. but i guess the point of this entire post is that regardless of whether you’re a hardcore fan or not, news is amazing and tegoshi is an inspiration unlike any other. and i greatly respect him.
huh? tegonyan

• aim for the stars •

So recently, this young girl who used to be our neighbor started getting into news/tegomasu and asked if I could give her my fave tracks from their albums.

Its been ages since I last listened to NewS. Sometimes I would feel like putting all songs in my music folder on shuffle then a random news/tm song would play and its either I skip it or listen inattentively- but I usually skipped it. To be very honest, it has been longer than what feels like a century since I last listened to news/tm with much enthusiasm. And I really didn't feel like checking out each of their songs- which're already quite unfamiliar to me now- to recall which ones I loved and 'favorited' but the girl kept bugging me and I just wanted to get things over with. So I opened each album, folder by folder (in no particular order), track by track....and as I kept going, this indescribable feeling just started creeping up on me. Everything just started coming back, welling up like a huge wave so painfully familiar it made me tear up. I listened to Snow Express and oh, tears. MY FEELS. When I reached hoshi wo mezashite, I just.....I was already close to sobbing.

Tegoshi's voice. That voice I had loved so much. And everything else. Everything just felt a little too nostalgic- if that's possible.

I do not regret having been in the news fandom. Neither do I regret having spent so much- TOO MUCH energy adoring Tegoshi.

I may no longer be a fan now, but those boys will always have a special place in my heart and I will always and forever have a soft spot for them. I used to think otherwise but well, I guess I was wrong.

Anyhow, I'm so done with being emotional lol
Let me just conclude that LIVE is NEWS' best album. ;o; COLOR too! Although the last NEWS release I downloaded was still Chankapaana so I don't know if they have much better albums and songs. Haha (want to recommend me some good songs I'm not aware of? omglol this feels weird???) I'm out. Bye.
tegopi shraing food XD

☂ happy birthday, jinyoung

to the old man who, according to hyunwoo, looks awkward no matter how you look at him. he, who’s so slender, so frail and looks like he’s going to break any time soon yet is able to pull a 5-member group together into a tight team. guides them to make sure they stay on the right path. encourages them, watches over them from behind, pushing their backs so they can get even closer to their goals and dreams. he who stays the only positive one and believing everything will be alright when the others lack motivation, are wavering and unsure. our leader. Jinyoung. happy happy birthdayi’ve only been a BANA for almost a year but i was truly very happy these past 10 months. i plan to stay with you until whenever. i’m sad when you’re sad, i laugh when you laugh and feel down when you are. thank you for providing us with good music that gets even better every time. for the bottomless love and effort you offer us. for all the hardwork. for existing. for being you. i hope you continue flying higher towards your dream. keep shining. happy 21st. i love you.
Yamapi Russ-K

☂ happy as a clam

So, B1A4's 3rd mini album got released today and it's f-l-a-w-l-e-s-s. I'm completely mind-blown. This is insane. My jaw has dropped below the ground and there's no way it would go back any time soon. 
I wasn't wrong when I said the songs in this album are going to be good. When I saw the details, I already knew the songs are worth anticipating but I didn't think they could be this good! ALL the songs are just breathtaking. I like how, they're introducing to us yet another different side of them but in a good and refreshing way, like always. I'm in awe. 
Jinyoung never fails to surprise me with his constantly increasing composing skills. He only started making songs 2 years ago but he just keeps improving tremendously! His songs have always been decent and I've liked all of them but this one is awesome beyond words. Bling Girl was his first ever compostion and it was already good. Though still lacking in many aspects. Baby I'm Sorry was the first composition that got used as title song and it was super catchy, although he kinda overdid it with the auto tune. Also, one of the things I wanted him to get rid of was the random english phrases like "you make me bright condition", "we got the better" and "dancing party time" and! he didn't fail me. This time, he didn't only improve in composing but also managed to get rid of the english phrases and...ugh I just don't know how his songs could get any better. But I know they will. Because Jinyoung's just amazing like that. I also noticed how his vocals have gotten so much better! He's able to maximize his potential and most importantly, kinda replace his ever so nasal singing voice with something more pleasant-sounding. He can now sing without sounding too nasal which I find very good. Ah, everything's just good good good. 
I totally want them to win with their song this time because... how can you not love it? It's perfect. 
Being a BANA is such a wonderful thing. 
Thank you, B1A4. 
Yamapi Russ-K

☂ and in Tegoshi's words, It's SHO time.

111127 Itte Q 2-hour SP Tego cut.  Tego becomes a Pizza Acrobat. Because he's awesome.

I luckily managed to obtain a quite decent quality. The software I used to cut the video sorta ruined the quality though. ): 

MF : 001 | 002

So to those who are having trouble joining the files--everyone, I assume--it's just because HJSplit can't read file names with characters of other languages. Sorry, my mistake. So if you've downloaded the files I uploaded, just rename them and take out the japanese characters. ^^ Again, sorry. 

I've also renamed the files on MF for future takers ;

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If MF doesn't work for you, I can upload to MU. Inform me.